Adriana is no longer afraid of her shadow. My aunt had the brilliant idea of teaching Adriana the sign for shadow. It's a complicated sign, combining the signs for "black" and "shape" (which is sort of creepy, isn't it? I mean, the first thing that brought to mind for me was Echthroi)(see, I told you Madeleine L'Engle's books were embedded in my brain), and it hasn't really taken so far.
But we've been waving at our shadows and making them dance every time she notices them, and this morning at the park, Adriana caught sight of her shadow and waved. Then she moved into the shade and stepped back out again, experimentally. I signed "shadow," and she looked at me and then back at her shadow, and continued on her way toward the swings.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Afraid of her own shadow...literally
I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me,
And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.
He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head;
And I see him jump before me, when I jump into my bed.
-Robert Louis Stevenson, A Child's Garden of Verses
Yesterday at the movie, Adriana was playing on the landing near the emergency exit. Just before I picked her up to take her back to our seat, she began pointing at the floor and whining. I looked at where she was pointing, but couldn't see much because of her shadow. I pulled her to the side so I could see if she had dropped something, but then she pointed into the area of her shadow again, and I realized that was going on: she had just noticed her shadow for the first time. I scooped her up and went back to where our friends were sitting, thinking that there was probably no line in her baby book for this particular developmental milestone.
Even though I had mentioned what had happened to Brian, I was surprised as I led Adriana toward the bathroom to brush her teeth before bed last night. As we walked into the bedroom, the light on Brian's bedside table cast our shadows before us onto the ground. Adriana stopped where she was and reached for my hand. She pointed anxiously at her shadow. "It's your shadow," I told her. "It's because of the light. It won't do anything bad." Nevertheless, she ran behind my legs. I called to Brian, who came in and made some shadow puppets on the floor for her. She seemed okay with that, but there was still something about her own shadow that made her uncomfortable.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Homonyms
In a language that is only symbols (although, aren't all languages just systems of symbols?), not sounds, are there homonyms? I suppose if you have always been deaf, it would be hard to imagine words sounding the same, rather like the inhabitants of Ixchel and their inability to understand the concept of vision in their eyeless world. But the sign language in our house happens simultaneously with spoken language, and it turns out homonyms (or homophones?) do come into play.
A few months ago Adriana learned the sign for glasses and now whenever she sees me without mine, sees Brian with his sunglasses on top of his head, or notices my sunglasses sitting out of their case, she makes the sign (well, her version of it). But I was confused last night as she made the sign over and over again (accompanied by the whine she always adds when she thinks we aren't paying proper attention to her signs) while pointing out onto our balcony. I was wearing my glasses, and there were no other glasses in sight. And then I realized what she was really pointing to: water glasses, left over from dinner, sitting on the table outside. It's such a little thing, but it's interesting to me to see how her language, her ability to communicate, and her display of all that she understands are developing.
A few months ago Adriana learned the sign for glasses and now whenever she sees me without mine, sees Brian with his sunglasses on top of his head, or notices my sunglasses sitting out of their case, she makes the sign (well, her version of it). But I was confused last night as she made the sign over and over again (accompanied by the whine she always adds when she thinks we aren't paying proper attention to her signs) while pointing out onto our balcony. I was wearing my glasses, and there were no other glasses in sight. And then I realized what she was really pointing to: water glasses, left over from dinner, sitting on the table outside. It's such a little thing, but it's interesting to me to see how her language, her ability to communicate, and her display of all that she understands are developing.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Nature walk: Castle Rock
We hiked at Castle Rock State Park once last fall and Brian has been wanting to go back ever since, but most weekends that he suggests going, I veto it because I am a horrible wife and enjoy making him suffer the weather report has always said that it was going to be 90 degrees there and I just refuse to hike in that kind of weather. But last weekend when Brian was talking about getting out for a hike, I checked the weather report and, after discovering it was "only" going to be in the low 80s, suggested we head up to Castle Rock.
We did the loop suggested by Bay Area Hiker except in reverse, sticking with the Saratoga Gap Trail at first and coming back down on the Ridge Trail, detouring slightly to the campgrounds so that Adriana could get out of the backpack and run around during lunch. I am not a very experienced hiker, and there are some bits of this hike that make me nervous, but I clung anxiously to the metal rope and didn't look down on one narrow part of the Saratoga Gap Trail (and carefully did not watch Brian as he did the same part with the baby on his back), and scooted along using five points of contact as I descended over a rocky bit on the Ridge Trail. But it's good for me to fight my natural inclination to be such a chicken, and the views from up there are worth it.
We did the loop suggested by Bay Area Hiker except in reverse, sticking with the Saratoga Gap Trail at first and coming back down on the Ridge Trail, detouring slightly to the campgrounds so that Adriana could get out of the backpack and run around during lunch. I am not a very experienced hiker, and there are some bits of this hike that make me nervous, but I clung anxiously to the metal rope and didn't look down on one narrow part of the Saratoga Gap Trail (and carefully did not watch Brian as he did the same part with the baby on his back), and scooted along using five points of contact as I descended over a rocky bit on the Ridge Trail. But it's good for me to fight my natural inclination to be such a chicken, and the views from up there are worth it.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
19 months
These days it seems as though our main goal is to wear Adriana out. I am naturally a bit of a hermit but I do need social interaction, so I think it is good that in order to keep Adriana happy (and tired at night) we have to get out to the park every day. We let her walk to and from the park most days, hoping to tired her even more. The walk is slow, as she stops to inspect leaves (big, leathery ones from the magnolias are the best), gather small rocks from the landscaping along the sidewalk, and pick up every piece of trash she encounters (I never realized how much litter there was in our neighborhood), and I have to remind myself that she is learning and that this is just as much fun and as interesting as the park for her. Plus, at least she's not climbing anything and terrifying me.
She has so much fun at the park, too. I think she was about 16 months old when she fell off a slide, and she'd been afraid of them ever since, but suddenly she's back on them, and clearly enjoying herself. We usually take a ball to the park, and she likes to chase that around. I do feel a bit silly playing fetch with a baby, but hey, it helps her sleep better at night. She has always been sensitive to different textures, disliking the feel of sand and grass, but she is beginning to play in the sandbox a bit. She still doesn't want to walk on the sand too much, but she'll sit at the edge and shovel sand into a pail. And last week at Eagle Park, where there is a spigot in the middle of the sand for the kids to made puddles with, she had a great time getting dirty and wet, which is totally unlike her.
It's so interesting to me to see Adriana show that she has a real memory now. It's a bit easier to see in the kids we know her age who are talking: when a child's mom mentions some activity from the weekend, the child will jump in here and there with little words that show she or he remembers the even too. But suddenly Adriana is showing that she remembers things, too. I think she did before, but now it is more obvious. After I had suffered one night from severe insomnia, Brian came home early from work to take her to the park and give me a break. The next night when he got home, she got her shoes and started signing for the park. When we arrived at my dad's house for a visit, she went first to the room where the stereo is, so she could request music, having remembered where he'd turned it on a few weeks before on our last visit. Then she ran straight for his fridge, where she can just barely reach the water and ice dispenser. And I was fascinated when, at play group one day she started signing "dog" and I turned to see that some friends who had brought their dogs to the group two weeks earlier had arrived. Adriana signed dog frantically, looking toward the tree where the dogs had been tied the last time they were there. The dogs weren't there this time though--it was just that Adriana associated this other mom and baby with their dogs. I was surprised that she remembered the dogs being there, but I was especially surprised that she could remember who the dogs had been with.
I wish I could remember when Adriana's imaginative play began. I suppose she was pretending to nurse a baby at 14 months. But now she plays little games all the time. She likes to pretend to feed her baby and to feed me. She makes her monkey turn somersaults. She picks up the watering can and pretends to water the plants on our balcony that are at her level. She gets her popper when I say it's time to vacuum to pretend that she is vacuuming. And she does seem to be something of a neat freak (although you wouldn't guess it by looking at our apartment). She can reach into kitchen drawers now, and often after she plays with a juicer or measuring cup for a little while, she puts it back and closes the drawer. If I splash water on the floor while I'm doing dishes or cooking, she gets a towel and wipes it up for me. After I give her a tissue to wipe her nose, she runs to put it in the trash herself.
Summer has been good for Adriana's eating. She tastes all the fruit at the farmer's market. Her favorites are berries. We're on a break from strawberries right now--I think they are responsible for the little rash around her mouth--so she is instead attempting to eat her weight in blackberries. She likes the veggies that Brian grills and gets excited when she sees me shucking corn. I wish she would eat more protein-rich foods, so I scramble her an egg a few times a week, and she is pretty good about eating cheese. She hasn't been particularly interested in what little meat she's been offered, but when Brian started calling the chicken he was offering her "bird," she suddenly was willing not only to try it but also to ask for more. I don't know if it was that "bird" was a word she recognizes or if it was because it's also a sign she knows so that she could ask for more, but I am totally calling beef "cow" the next time it's offered to her.
Her sleep still isn't perfect, but it's improving. We've discussed night weaning, but it always sounds a little traumatic or just like too much work, and I give up the idea rather quickly. It's not that I'm still at the point that I hear mothers talk about where they treasure the nighttime feedings with their babies, since I barely remember most of the nighttime feedings. Some nights are better than others, and I think things are improving. Last summer, Adriana was still consistently waking up several times a night and then getting up for the day around seven. Brian would get up with her and I would get up an hour later to find them out on the balcony together while Brian ate breakfast. It was very sweet to see them together, and I loved getting that extra hour of sleep. Now that she sleeps better, I'm usually the first one up, and I have been treasuring my quiet time in the morning, so I was a little disappointed on Friday morning when, after nursing Adriana back down at 6:30 and getting up to feed the cat, I turned to find her right behind me, smiling. I drank my juice while she played, and then I made myself a cup of cocoa and took it out on the balcony to enjoy the cool, grey morning air. Adriana joined me, and we ate some berries and cereal together, and then cuddled in the chair while we watched hummingbirds at our feeder. She's normally so active that I don't get a lot of snuggles except when she is nursing, tired, or sick, and I was so glad that she had gotten up early that day to share my quiet time.
She has so much fun at the park, too. I think she was about 16 months old when she fell off a slide, and she'd been afraid of them ever since, but suddenly she's back on them, and clearly enjoying herself. We usually take a ball to the park, and she likes to chase that around. I do feel a bit silly playing fetch with a baby, but hey, it helps her sleep better at night. She has always been sensitive to different textures, disliking the feel of sand and grass, but she is beginning to play in the sandbox a bit. She still doesn't want to walk on the sand too much, but she'll sit at the edge and shovel sand into a pail. And last week at Eagle Park, where there is a spigot in the middle of the sand for the kids to made puddles with, she had a great time getting dirty and wet, which is totally unlike her.
It's so interesting to me to see Adriana show that she has a real memory now. It's a bit easier to see in the kids we know her age who are talking: when a child's mom mentions some activity from the weekend, the child will jump in here and there with little words that show she or he remembers the even too. But suddenly Adriana is showing that she remembers things, too. I think she did before, but now it is more obvious. After I had suffered one night from severe insomnia, Brian came home early from work to take her to the park and give me a break. The next night when he got home, she got her shoes and started signing for the park. When we arrived at my dad's house for a visit, she went first to the room where the stereo is, so she could request music, having remembered where he'd turned it on a few weeks before on our last visit. Then she ran straight for his fridge, where she can just barely reach the water and ice dispenser. And I was fascinated when, at play group one day she started signing "dog" and I turned to see that some friends who had brought their dogs to the group two weeks earlier had arrived. Adriana signed dog frantically, looking toward the tree where the dogs had been tied the last time they were there. The dogs weren't there this time though--it was just that Adriana associated this other mom and baby with their dogs. I was surprised that she remembered the dogs being there, but I was especially surprised that she could remember who the dogs had been with.
I wish I could remember when Adriana's imaginative play began. I suppose she was pretending to nurse a baby at 14 months. But now she plays little games all the time. She likes to pretend to feed her baby and to feed me. She makes her monkey turn somersaults. She picks up the watering can and pretends to water the plants on our balcony that are at her level. She gets her popper when I say it's time to vacuum to pretend that she is vacuuming. And she does seem to be something of a neat freak (although you wouldn't guess it by looking at our apartment). She can reach into kitchen drawers now, and often after she plays with a juicer or measuring cup for a little while, she puts it back and closes the drawer. If I splash water on the floor while I'm doing dishes or cooking, she gets a towel and wipes it up for me. After I give her a tissue to wipe her nose, she runs to put it in the trash herself.
Summer has been good for Adriana's eating. She tastes all the fruit at the farmer's market. Her favorites are berries. We're on a break from strawberries right now--I think they are responsible for the little rash around her mouth--so she is instead attempting to eat her weight in blackberries. She likes the veggies that Brian grills and gets excited when she sees me shucking corn. I wish she would eat more protein-rich foods, so I scramble her an egg a few times a week, and she is pretty good about eating cheese. She hasn't been particularly interested in what little meat she's been offered, but when Brian started calling the chicken he was offering her "bird," she suddenly was willing not only to try it but also to ask for more. I don't know if it was that "bird" was a word she recognizes or if it was because it's also a sign she knows so that she could ask for more, but I am totally calling beef "cow" the next time it's offered to her.
Her sleep still isn't perfect, but it's improving. We've discussed night weaning, but it always sounds a little traumatic or just like too much work, and I give up the idea rather quickly. It's not that I'm still at the point that I hear mothers talk about where they treasure the nighttime feedings with their babies, since I barely remember most of the nighttime feedings. Some nights are better than others, and I think things are improving. Last summer, Adriana was still consistently waking up several times a night and then getting up for the day around seven. Brian would get up with her and I would get up an hour later to find them out on the balcony together while Brian ate breakfast. It was very sweet to see them together, and I loved getting that extra hour of sleep. Now that she sleeps better, I'm usually the first one up, and I have been treasuring my quiet time in the morning, so I was a little disappointed on Friday morning when, after nursing Adriana back down at 6:30 and getting up to feed the cat, I turned to find her right behind me, smiling. I drank my juice while she played, and then I made myself a cup of cocoa and took it out on the balcony to enjoy the cool, grey morning air. Adriana joined me, and we ate some berries and cereal together, and then cuddled in the chair while we watched hummingbirds at our feeder. She's normally so active that I don't get a lot of snuggles except when she is nursing, tired, or sick, and I was so glad that she had gotten up early that day to share my quiet time.
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
Things that made me happy last night
1. Going outside to admire the color of the sky at sunset and seeing a rainbow.
2. Two silly monkeys with their "big smiles."
2. Two silly monkeys with their "big smiles."
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Hi Mary Ellen!
Look! It's not a sandwich recipe anymore! Aren't you happy?
Instead, here are some pictures of a little girl eating corn:
Instead, here are some pictures of a little girl eating corn:
Monday, July 21, 2008
Brian's Farmers Market Sandwiches
Brian has made these sandwiches the past couple of Sunday nights, made almost completely with goodies we bought at the farmer's market that day. The measurements are approximate as we didn't really measure anything.
- 1 small Italian purple eggplant, cut into 1/4-inches slices
- 1 medium onion, sliced
- 1-2 medium tomatoes, sliced and seeded (we've been using the "celebrity" variety from a farm in Paso Robles, which are firm and a bit tart)
- 4 slices of bread (The first time we used the excellent honey whole wheat sandwich bread from the Great Harvest folks and they were good, but Acme Bread Company's levain is much sturdier and holds up to the grilling )
- cheese (we used queso bravo last week, but I preferred the mild gouda we used last night, next week I want to try their edam)
- 1/4 cup olive oil
- 1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
- handful of chopped fresh herbs (we used mostly basil with a bit of oregano)
- canola oil
- Brush the onion and eggplant with canola oil and grill until they are tender and have thick grill marks on them.
- Whisk together the olive oil, vinegar, and herbs.
- Assemble the sandwiches, brushing the vegetables with the herb mixture.
- Grill the sandwiches until the cheese is melted and the bread is toasty.
A year ago, today, a year from now
A year ago today I was surrounded by boxes in our new apartment, reading the new Harry Potter book while Brian unpacked and minded the baby. I felt slightly guilty, and kept reminding myself that he had been warned months in advance that he was on baby duty once that book arrived. Was it my fault that the book's release date happened to fall on the first Saturday after we moved in?
Today I rode my bike to a La Leche League group in the morning., ate lunch with Adriana out on the deck after we got home, and then put her down for her nap. We'll do the grocery shopping and a bit of planting this afternoon.
It's hard for me to wrap my mind around a year from now. What is life with a two-and-a-half-year-old like? Before I had a baby I could envision my life a year or two into the future without much difficulty, but now things change so quickly that it's hard to say.
Today I rode my bike to a La Leche League group in the morning., ate lunch with Adriana out on the deck after we got home, and then put her down for her nap. We'll do the grocery shopping and a bit of planting this afternoon.
It's hard for me to wrap my mind around a year from now. What is life with a two-and-a-half-year-old like? Before I had a baby I could envision my life a year or two into the future without much difficulty, but now things change so quickly that it's hard to say.
Friday, July 11, 2008
18 months
For forty-five minutes once a week, things are fantastic. I mean, things are pretty good most of the time, but this month Adriana started a toddler gymnastics class, and for the forty-five minutes we are there, we are essentially in the proverbial padded room. She climbs and slides and bounces and balances, and if she falls she will land on something soft. It is still my instinct when I see her start to fall to reach out to catch her, of course, but the other day I just slowed her fall and let her tumble gentle from the structure she was climbing from to the mat. She rolled over, pushed herself to her feet, caught sight of a tunnel to crawl through, and headed off towards it. I felt a little funny signing her up for gymnastics. I mean, classes? At one and a half? And the last class we tried out didn't go so well. But at this age the class has no structure--it's just free play in a padded room, and the teacher will give individual instruction if we ask--and Adriana is clearly having fun. She runs in circles on the big trampoline, falling and picking herself back up, over and over again. She holds my hand and concentrates as she puts one foot carefully in front of the other on the balance beam. She does her funny, floppy somersaults uphill on the wedge-shaped mats. And she hides behind my legs and peeks out at Teacher Russ if he tries to talk to her (although at the end of class, when he gets out an ink pad to give each kid an animal stamp on their hand, she runs to him and holds out both arms for stamps).
Adriana is a pretty flexible kid when it comes to the schedule and pattern of our days, but I am discovering that she likes other things a certain way. Before she get in her high chair to eat, she likes to have her monkey, panda, and baby all lined up to watch her. If I don't close a drawer or cupboard in the kitchen completely, she'll run to close it for me, or, if she's trapped in her high chair, whine and point until I do it. When she catches me without my glasses on she'll sign for glasses and point to them until I put them on again. If water splashes on the floor while I'm doing dishes, she'll get a towel to wipe it up.
It's fun to notice the things she has figured out. These days she knows all about getting ready. If she joins me in the bathroom after I shower, she points to the deodorant and motions as though she is putting it on, then indicates the lotion bottle, knowing the routine. After I've dried her off after her bath, she spreads out the towel on the floor and lies down for me to put a diaper on her. Her grandma had gotten out a baby silverware set when we visited last week, and Adriana picked up the pusher and immediately pulled it along her cheek, since it looked to her like one of her daddy's razors.
She wants to do everything I do. If I am on the phone, she goes to get hers. When I get out the vacuum, she follows me around with her popper. When I fold laundry, she takes clothes and towels out of the basket and hands them to me, one by one. She follows me around and inspects all the plants that are at her level when I am watering them.
She has become a better eater, but it still surprises me when she eats an entire banana or gobbles up the potato salad I just put on her plate and then demands more. One of her favorite foods is strawberries, which she demands whenever she sees me slicing them up for my cereal. I am more than happy to feed them to her, because although she eats dinner every day and lunch most days, in the mornings she doesn't eat much. I suppose it's because she nurses as she wakes up, or because she is too busy watching Brian get ready for work and checking out all her toys (sometimes it seems as if she is surprised they are still there). This past week, though, she hasn't eaten nearly as much. Instead, she is nursing--often and for long periods of time. I keep blaming the heat, since I often don't want to each much in the 90-degree weather we've been having, even though that seems a bit weird, since warm milk and snuggling don't seem that appealing in the middle of a heat wave either. Whatever it is, it makes me hungry and thirsty to be nursing so much, even if it is hot, which is totally why I need so much ice cream and lemonade.
Signing is definitely Adriana's language of choice. She hasn't added any actual words in the last month, but she has over 50 signs now, and they seem...unconscious: one night when we were in Colorado, Brian and I both woke up and watched Adriana as she squirmed and cried between us, signing "ball" with her eyes closed. This morning as she woke up, she signed "toothbrush please," and then she nursed and fell back to sleep.
Everything seems so adorable. She walks on tiptoe and gives kisses to her reflection in the mirror (also high fives and terrorist fist jabs) and dances to Ozomatli and Dan Zanes and Melissa Ferrick. If you hold her hand and ask her to spin, she'll go around in circles, but if she doesn't have a hand to hold, she just twists her body and shakes her head from side to side.
I still struggle a bit with parenting a toddler, but things are improving and I am starting to love this age. I can tell because when I sit down and think about what to write this month, it's all about gymnastics and funny faces and cute little moments. We're still dealing with early onset two-ness and what to do about the hitting, but those aren't the first things that come to mind.
Adriana is a pretty flexible kid when it comes to the schedule and pattern of our days, but I am discovering that she likes other things a certain way. Before she get in her high chair to eat, she likes to have her monkey, panda, and baby all lined up to watch her. If I don't close a drawer or cupboard in the kitchen completely, she'll run to close it for me, or, if she's trapped in her high chair, whine and point until I do it. When she catches me without my glasses on she'll sign for glasses and point to them until I put them on again. If water splashes on the floor while I'm doing dishes, she'll get a towel to wipe it up.
It's fun to notice the things she has figured out. These days she knows all about getting ready. If she joins me in the bathroom after I shower, she points to the deodorant and motions as though she is putting it on, then indicates the lotion bottle, knowing the routine. After I've dried her off after her bath, she spreads out the towel on the floor and lies down for me to put a diaper on her. Her grandma had gotten out a baby silverware set when we visited last week, and Adriana picked up the pusher and immediately pulled it along her cheek, since it looked to her like one of her daddy's razors.
She wants to do everything I do. If I am on the phone, she goes to get hers. When I get out the vacuum, she follows me around with her popper. When I fold laundry, she takes clothes and towels out of the basket and hands them to me, one by one. She follows me around and inspects all the plants that are at her level when I am watering them.
She has become a better eater, but it still surprises me when she eats an entire banana or gobbles up the potato salad I just put on her plate and then demands more. One of her favorite foods is strawberries, which she demands whenever she sees me slicing them up for my cereal. I am more than happy to feed them to her, because although she eats dinner every day and lunch most days, in the mornings she doesn't eat much. I suppose it's because she nurses as she wakes up, or because she is too busy watching Brian get ready for work and checking out all her toys (sometimes it seems as if she is surprised they are still there). This past week, though, she hasn't eaten nearly as much. Instead, she is nursing--often and for long periods of time. I keep blaming the heat, since I often don't want to each much in the 90-degree weather we've been having, even though that seems a bit weird, since warm milk and snuggling don't seem that appealing in the middle of a heat wave either. Whatever it is, it makes me hungry and thirsty to be nursing so much, even if it is hot, which is totally why I need so much ice cream and lemonade.
Signing is definitely Adriana's language of choice. She hasn't added any actual words in the last month, but she has over 50 signs now, and they seem...unconscious: one night when we were in Colorado, Brian and I both woke up and watched Adriana as she squirmed and cried between us, signing "ball" with her eyes closed. This morning as she woke up, she signed "toothbrush please," and then she nursed and fell back to sleep.
Everything seems so adorable. She walks on tiptoe and gives kisses to her reflection in the mirror (also high fives and terrorist fist jabs) and dances to Ozomatli and Dan Zanes and Melissa Ferrick. If you hold her hand and ask her to spin, she'll go around in circles, but if she doesn't have a hand to hold, she just twists her body and shakes her head from side to side.
I still struggle a bit with parenting a toddler, but things are improving and I am starting to love this age. I can tell because when I sit down and think about what to write this month, it's all about gymnastics and funny faces and cute little moments. We're still dealing with early onset two-ness and what to do about the hitting, but those aren't the first things that come to mind.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Season with a prayer and song (and some fresh herbs from my deck)
Today I am longing to buy a house. I go back and forth on this. We have some money saved for a down payment, but what we could buy with that amount in the area we have chosen to live is pretty ridiculous. And buying just sounds so terrifying--permanent and reeking of responsibility. But from time to time we (well, I) get the urge to buy , so we (okay, I) look at listings and scoff at the prices and decide that our apartment is just fine, and also it comes with maintenance staff.
The other day I started pulling up listings again, and this time I limited my search to single-family homes. I didn't want to look at condos, because my house lust this time was actually yard lust. Or, really, garden lust, because it's not as though I just want a place to set up a swingset for Adriana--I rather like going to the park. It's sort of funny if you actually know me. I mean, Brian gave me a plant shortly after we started dating. I promptly forgot to water it, and in promptly keeled over and died. Nine years later, I'm sitting here thinking that it would be great to grow a vegetable garden. And all because I've kept some herbs alive on my balcony for a couple of months.
I would love to grow some of my own vegetables. I want to plant chard and asparagus, tomatoes and eggplant. We go to the farmers market nearly every weekend and I can get perfectly beautiful produce there.* In fact, I declined an offer to share a CSA box with a friend because I like going to the market every week.** But the entire process of growing things in post on my balcony has been so much fun, from picking out the plants at the farmers market and nursery, to getting my hands dirty while I planted them, to watering them and checking their growth, to finally being able to use them. It's incredibly rewarding to go outside to trim some basil for a pesto, some oregano for a vegetable stew, or mint for mojitos, and now I am getting greedy and wanting to grow even more.
Maybe a rental house?
*My friend Adam told me I was "such a housewife" last week because I mentioned something about the eggplants starting to show up at the market. So I informed him that corn was coming in, too, but cherries and blueberries are on their way out.
**Although I admit that I am not very adventurous, and maybe the CSA box would help me branch out a bit.
The other day I started pulling up listings again, and this time I limited my search to single-family homes. I didn't want to look at condos, because my house lust this time was actually yard lust. Or, really, garden lust, because it's not as though I just want a place to set up a swingset for Adriana--I rather like going to the park. It's sort of funny if you actually know me. I mean, Brian gave me a plant shortly after we started dating. I promptly forgot to water it, and in promptly keeled over and died. Nine years later, I'm sitting here thinking that it would be great to grow a vegetable garden. And all because I've kept some herbs alive on my balcony for a couple of months.
I would love to grow some of my own vegetables. I want to plant chard and asparagus, tomatoes and eggplant. We go to the farmers market nearly every weekend and I can get perfectly beautiful produce there.* In fact, I declined an offer to share a CSA box with a friend because I like going to the market every week.** But the entire process of growing things in post on my balcony has been so much fun, from picking out the plants at the farmers market and nursery, to getting my hands dirty while I planted them, to watering them and checking their growth, to finally being able to use them. It's incredibly rewarding to go outside to trim some basil for a pesto, some oregano for a vegetable stew, or mint for mojitos, and now I am getting greedy and wanting to grow even more.
Maybe a rental house?
*My friend Adam told me I was "such a housewife" last week because I mentioned something about the eggplants starting to show up at the market. So I informed him that corn was coming in, too, but cherries and blueberries are on their way out.
**Although I admit that I am not very adventurous, and maybe the CSA box would help me branch out a bit.
Four items
1. Adriana does somersaults now. She get into a sort of down-dog position and then I either help her flip over, or she tries to do it herself. Every now and then she really does a proper somersault herself. The rest of the time she just falls over to the side. Whichever way it ends up working out, she giggles a lot.
2. Last night Adriana ate curry so hot it made her nose run. And when she ran out of curry she started dipping all her other food in the leftover sauce on the highchair tray.
3. Early this morning Adriana woke up crying and I pulled her into my bed with me. After she nursed she got up, crawled back into her own bed, and collapsed back into sleep.
4. Approximately 4,956 times each day I ask Adriana for a big smile. Because it makes her make this face:
2. Last night Adriana ate curry so hot it made her nose run. And when she ran out of curry she started dipping all her other food in the leftover sauce on the highchair tray.
3. Early this morning Adriana woke up crying and I pulled her into my bed with me. After she nursed she got up, crawled back into her own bed, and collapsed back into sleep.
4. Approximately 4,956 times each day I ask Adriana for a big smile. Because it makes her make this face:
Where somebody knows my name
I was excited to move back to California last year. I knew I would miss our life and our friends in DC, but California was home and I was glad to be going back. But as much as I thought of California as home, it has taken some time for Mountain View to become home. The home in California in my mind, my heart, was our little house in Santa Cruz, our friends' home in Berkeley, my dad's house in Martinez. It was all the places I used to go to and the things I used to do. Mountain View was...Mountain View. It was nicer than I expected it to be, but it wasn't what I knew. It's been nearly a year now, but at last it is happening, at last I feel at home. It's not that I'm any more settled into our apartment or that I've finally found a routine--those things happened ages ago. It was just one simple thing: at last month's Thursday Night Live, I ran into someone I knew.
It's funny how that has made such a difference to me, and how happy I have been since then to wave to people I know at the farmer's market or have a friend suddenly sit down beside me while I'm watching Adriana play somewhere. When we moved here, I knew exactly one person in the area. I joined a playgroup and La Leche League and attended yoga classes. All of those things were hard for me. I'm an introvert. I joke with Brian that the reason I keep friends so long is that I'm terrified (and too socially inept) to make new ones. And while that may not be the reason that I keep my old friends around, the fear is certainly real. But being lonely is worse. It's not as though I've forged a lot of close, personal friendships here. Those will come with time (would they come sooner if it weren't so easy to maintain older friendships in this world of cell phones and email?), but seeing a friendly face and stopping to chat at the grocery store or the mall or the farmer's market or the playground has made an important enough difference for now.
It's funny how that has made such a difference to me, and how happy I have been since then to wave to people I know at the farmer's market or have a friend suddenly sit down beside me while I'm watching Adriana play somewhere. When we moved here, I knew exactly one person in the area. I joined a playgroup and La Leche League and attended yoga classes. All of those things were hard for me. I'm an introvert. I joke with Brian that the reason I keep friends so long is that I'm terrified (and too socially inept) to make new ones. And while that may not be the reason that I keep my old friends around, the fear is certainly real. But being lonely is worse. It's not as though I've forged a lot of close, personal friendships here. Those will come with time (would they come sooner if it weren't so easy to maintain older friendships in this world of cell phones and email?), but seeing a friendly face and stopping to chat at the grocery store or the mall or the farmer's market or the playground has made an important enough difference for now.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Nature walk: Red Rocks
Brian and I recently spent a few days in Colorado. His cousin was getting married in a little town four hours outside of Denver, and it seemed like a good idea to tack a couple of days onto the trip. We spent several days staying with Brian's grandfather outside of Denver and also got a chance to visit an old friend in Boulder.
I am a person who loves the water. I am enamored of the ocean in particular, but rivers and lakes are also fine. I tend to forget that there is also beauty and peace in other landscapes as well. But when I was in Colorado there was no denying the beauty: the scale of things in the Rockies put everything in perspective, especially as we drove west on I-70 to get to Meeker for the wedding, and the light is different--more pale and more intense, in a way I could not capture with my camera. I definitely want to go back to Colorado. I want to spend more time hiking high up in the mountains, and perhaps explore some areas on the western slope--the Glenwood Canyon area especially stood out to me.
The only hike we did on this trip was around the Red Rocks Amphitheater, which is not far from Brian's grandpa. We chose the Trading Post Loop trail, which was described as a challenge 1.5-mile back country trail by the sign at the trailhead. We actually found the trail to be fairly easy, but since we had a four-hour drive ahead of us, it was probably for the best that we did something quick. And in that mile and a half, I did manage to take about 100 pictures, so in awe was I of the geology.
I am a person who loves the water. I am enamored of the ocean in particular, but rivers and lakes are also fine. I tend to forget that there is also beauty and peace in other landscapes as well. But when I was in Colorado there was no denying the beauty: the scale of things in the Rockies put everything in perspective, especially as we drove west on I-70 to get to Meeker for the wedding, and the light is different--more pale and more intense, in a way I could not capture with my camera. I definitely want to go back to Colorado. I want to spend more time hiking high up in the mountains, and perhaps explore some areas on the western slope--the Glenwood Canyon area especially stood out to me.
The only hike we did on this trip was around the Red Rocks Amphitheater, which is not far from Brian's grandpa. We chose the Trading Post Loop trail, which was described as a challenge 1.5-mile back country trail by the sign at the trailhead. We actually found the trail to be fairly easy, but since we had a four-hour drive ahead of us, it was probably for the best that we did something quick. And in that mile and a half, I did manage to take about 100 pictures, so in awe was I of the geology.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Wishes
Yesterday I ran some errands at the Stanford Shopping Center. After I'd finished the shopping, Adriana and I played around the Merfrog Fountain for over an hour. She climbed up and down the steps, reached under the rail to splash her hands in the water (and then dried them on my pants), tried to imitate the older kids who ran around in circles, pointed at every dog that walked by, and fell over every now and then.
A mother with two young children stopped for a while. She was giving them pennies from her purse to toss into the fountain, and then she tossed in one herself. Adriana watched the boy and girl with interest, and their mother handed her a penny. With a look of complete glee, Adriana threw the coin overhand into the fountain.
I wondered what the little boy and girl were wishing for as they tossed their coins and what it was their mother had wished for. What will Adriana wish for one day when she is old enough to understand the concept? And then I realized that I cannot recall what sorts of things I used to wish for as a child throwing coins into the fountain outside Martinez City Hall when we went to visit my grandma at work or blew the seeds off of a dandelion. Did I wish for something concrete--a new toy or an ice cream cone? Or was it something more abstract, as my wishes are now when I indulge my childhood superstitions.
And I watched Adriana, realizing that not all my recent wishes have been all that abstract as I remembered all the coins I tossed into fountains and dandelion seeds I'd sent flying not so long ago, wishing for baby.
A mother with two young children stopped for a while. She was giving them pennies from her purse to toss into the fountain, and then she tossed in one herself. Adriana watched the boy and girl with interest, and their mother handed her a penny. With a look of complete glee, Adriana threw the coin overhand into the fountain.
I wondered what the little boy and girl were wishing for as they tossed their coins and what it was their mother had wished for. What will Adriana wish for one day when she is old enough to understand the concept? And then I realized that I cannot recall what sorts of things I used to wish for as a child throwing coins into the fountain outside Martinez City Hall when we went to visit my grandma at work or blew the seeds off of a dandelion. Did I wish for something concrete--a new toy or an ice cream cone? Or was it something more abstract, as my wishes are now when I indulge my childhood superstitions.
And I watched Adriana, realizing that not all my recent wishes have been all that abstract as I remembered all the coins I tossed into fountains and dandelion seeds I'd sent flying not so long ago, wishing for baby.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Science lesson: Shattering Pyrex
Yesterday as I was putting away some dishes, two Pyrex measuring cups that I had nested together on a shelf above my head came crashing down and bounced off of my water glass on the counter onto the floor. I put the measuring cups back up on the shelf, stuck the baby in her highchair, and set about cleaning up the shattered water glass. Later in the day, when my friend Adam and I were getting ready to make margaritas, I pulled down the measuring cups and found that they were wedged together. It sometimes happens, since they aren't really meant to be like that, but unlike all previous times, just giving them a little twist didn't do the trick. I assumed the impact from the earlier fall is what made the difference.
Adam and I considered the possiblities as we took turns twisting and prying at the cups. Hot water? Cold water? Which would make the glass expand and which would make it contract? And besides, if they both expanded or contracted, what good would it do? Where was an engineer when the humanities and sociology majors needed one? (Oh, right. He was at work, celebrating his 30th birthday with a singing telegram in the form of a gorilla in a tutu.) We decided that ice would make the glass contract, both of us having some memory of water being an anomaly because it expands as it freezes. But then Adam started to worry about whether the glass would break if exposed to extreme temperatures.
"No, I think Pyrex is meant to survive temperatures like that. That's why you bake with it," I said. "Besides I think it was made for like train lanterns or something initially. I read an article about it once. Maybe in the New Yorker. I mean, doesn't that sound like a New Yorker kind of article? A twenty-page exposition on the history of Pyrex?"
Adam turned to Google, typing in "nested pyrex stuck," or something along those lines. And then began reading articles about an investigation into exploding Pyrex. After a few of those he came to a message board where people had discussed exactly our problem. Drinking glasses would be easier to separate, as Pyrex by design doesn't expand or contract quite as easily with temperature changes, but it could be done. I filled the one-cup measure with ice and poured water of the top of it and then submerged the quart-sized measuring up into a sink of hot water.
Adam went back to browsing articles about Pyrex that had essentially exploded at high heat. I tried wiggling the measuring cups apart after a minute, but stepped away when I discovered they were still wedged together quite firmly. Adam read a paragraph to me, and I stopped him.
"Pyrex isn't supposed to do that. And those were probably at much higher temperatures that just the water from my tap." And then there was the sound of shattering glass, as the outer measuring cup broke. Big pieces came off the top, shards of glass scattered around the sink and onto the floor, and the bottom part sat in the sink full of little cracks.
Incidentally, this is the second time I've managed to do in some Pyrex. At one point I managed to drop a large baking pan on the floor at just the right angle to break it into several large pieces.
Adam and I considered the possiblities as we took turns twisting and prying at the cups. Hot water? Cold water? Which would make the glass expand and which would make it contract? And besides, if they both expanded or contracted, what good would it do? Where was an engineer when the humanities and sociology majors needed one? (Oh, right. He was at work, celebrating his 30th birthday with a singing telegram in the form of a gorilla in a tutu.) We decided that ice would make the glass contract, both of us having some memory of water being an anomaly because it expands as it freezes. But then Adam started to worry about whether the glass would break if exposed to extreme temperatures.
"No, I think Pyrex is meant to survive temperatures like that. That's why you bake with it," I said. "Besides I think it was made for like train lanterns or something initially. I read an article about it once. Maybe in the New Yorker. I mean, doesn't that sound like a New Yorker kind of article? A twenty-page exposition on the history of Pyrex?"
Adam turned to Google, typing in "nested pyrex stuck," or something along those lines. And then began reading articles about an investigation into exploding Pyrex. After a few of those he came to a message board where people had discussed exactly our problem. Drinking glasses would be easier to separate, as Pyrex by design doesn't expand or contract quite as easily with temperature changes, but it could be done. I filled the one-cup measure with ice and poured water of the top of it and then submerged the quart-sized measuring up into a sink of hot water.
Adam went back to browsing articles about Pyrex that had essentially exploded at high heat. I tried wiggling the measuring cups apart after a minute, but stepped away when I discovered they were still wedged together quite firmly. Adam read a paragraph to me, and I stopped him.
"Pyrex isn't supposed to do that. And those were probably at much higher temperatures that just the water from my tap." And then there was the sound of shattering glass, as the outer measuring cup broke. Big pieces came off the top, shards of glass scattered around the sink and onto the floor, and the bottom part sat in the sink full of little cracks.
Incidentally, this is the second time I've managed to do in some Pyrex. At one point I managed to drop a large baking pan on the floor at just the right angle to break it into several large pieces.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Nature walk: Purisima Redwoods
I had intended to save hiking in Purisima Redwoods for a hot summer day, when the elevation and shade would provide respite for Brian from my whining about the weather. But then I started planning to do it Memorial Day weekend and invited Rachel and Lincoln and changes in plans make me a little crazy, so even though it was cool and damp, we went ahead. Which was fantastic because cool + damp + redwoods =
BANANA SLUGS. I still remember a song about banana slugs from sixth-grade camp. If you aren't nice to me, I'll sing it to you. (Right here is where I should totally post a picture of Rachel cowering in fear that I will actually sing said song. But I didn't take any pictures of Rachel because I was too busy aiming my camera at slugs. And poop.)
Also, do you know how much joy it brings me that someone felt compelled to named something "sticky monkey flower"?
Thursday, June 12, 2008
17 months
Yesterday I ran into someone I hadn't seen in a couple of months. I admired her six-week-old baby, asleep in her stroller, and then my friend turned and saw Adriana coming towards us and exclaimed that Adriana wasn't a baby anymore, that she'd turned into a kid. I looked at Adriana running towards me with a green ball in her hand, grinning, her bangs falling into her face, and I realized that, yes, she is a kid now, not a baby. And instead of feeling melancholy over that, I was happy. Then last night she fell asleep in my arms after dinner, and I sat there for a long time, chatting with my dad and sister, just glad to have this change to hold her and admire her long lashes and flushed cheeks and her little, tired body that fits so perfectly in my arms, no matter how big she is getting.
She has begun babbling constantly it seems. She says "woof woof," "moo," and "baa," when asked what dogs, cows, and sheep say. She says "muh" and shakes her head when she means "no." (She says "muh" an awful lot.) She learns new signs quickly, and has started signing "please" and "thank you" on occasion, which I find sweet. Yesterday she fed me one of her Cheerios while I was getting us ready to leave the house, and then started freaking out. When I turned my attention to her, I realized that she was frantically signing "thank you." So I thanked her, which I usually do when she feeds me but hadn't this time because I was distracted, and she was happy. In general, when she makes a sign--whether it's "ball" when she sees kids playing soccer at the park or "bird" when she hears one chirping outside--she keeps making the sign until we say the word to her.
A couple of weeks ago we got Adriana her own "big girl bed." It's a twin bed pushed up against our bed, and we are slowly making the transition. I played with her in the bed the day it was delivered and she lovede being tucked in and kissed goodnight. Then she would kick off the covers and do it again. When we lie down to nurse she prefers to lie in her bed rather than ours. I think she is glad to have a little more space to sleep in at night, as she seems to be sleeping much better (most nights, anyhow) now that she's in her own bed. I move into her bed to nurse her when she wakes up around 2 or 3, and if I am still awake when she is finished, I move back over into my bed. Sometimes I pull her in with me, and she has even crawled back into her bed a couple of times when I've done that.
Not too long ago, Adriana fell off a slide at the park. Brian had gone up the play structure with her and she was going down the slide by herself. I was sitting on a bench nearby, not near enough to catch her, as she went down the slide as she has done on her own plenty of times before, and shot off the bottom, landing on her back. (I think it was because she was wearing Robeez instead of sandals, and they didn't drag and slow her down.) She was more scared than hurt, and soon was climbing up to go down again. That time she again went too fast, but I was there to catch her. After that, she would climb up but refused to go down the slide, even on a lap or with someone there to catch her. In a way I was relieved. It's kind of nice to know that the child can actually learn from what has happened, and nice that she has a bit of fear. I've been wondering where this kid who climbs everything and goes down the biggest slides at the playground came from, given the fact that I am just about the world's biggest scaredy-cat. But I was also a little sad, because being a scaredy-cat is boring and frustrating. So even though I have been attempting to coax her down toddler-appropriate slides for the past ten days or so, I had mixed feeling yesterday when Adriana finally got over some caution and climbed to the highest point on the play structure at the park (easily 10 or 12 feet up, maybe more--I am a bad at guessing that kind of thing), and started to go down the slide by herself. In the end, I decided not to stop her from climbing, but I made her go down the slide in my lap.
Some days I'm better at this than others. Some days when Adriana shrieks for the 94th time that hour because I didn't respond to her quickly enough, instead of looking at the clock to see how much longer until Brian comes home, I kneel down in front of her and tell her that it's hard being little and hug her, and then offer her a snack or a toy or just tickle her. Some days, instead of just being glad that I managed to get both Adriana and myself dressed and that I had a chance to bake (and eat most of) a pan of brownies while she napped, I manage to plan and shop for meal for the week, wash and put away three loads of laundry, vacuum the house, fix dinner, and put together puzzles, read stories, and play at the park with Adriana. Most days fall somewhere in between. But every single day I know I am lucky.
She has begun babbling constantly it seems. She says "woof woof," "moo," and "baa," when asked what dogs, cows, and sheep say. She says "muh" and shakes her head when she means "no." (She says "muh" an awful lot.) She learns new signs quickly, and has started signing "please" and "thank you" on occasion, which I find sweet. Yesterday she fed me one of her Cheerios while I was getting us ready to leave the house, and then started freaking out. When I turned my attention to her, I realized that she was frantically signing "thank you." So I thanked her, which I usually do when she feeds me but hadn't this time because I was distracted, and she was happy. In general, when she makes a sign--whether it's "ball" when she sees kids playing soccer at the park or "bird" when she hears one chirping outside--she keeps making the sign until we say the word to her.
A couple of weeks ago we got Adriana her own "big girl bed." It's a twin bed pushed up against our bed, and we are slowly making the transition. I played with her in the bed the day it was delivered and she lovede being tucked in and kissed goodnight. Then she would kick off the covers and do it again. When we lie down to nurse she prefers to lie in her bed rather than ours. I think she is glad to have a little more space to sleep in at night, as she seems to be sleeping much better (most nights, anyhow) now that she's in her own bed. I move into her bed to nurse her when she wakes up around 2 or 3, and if I am still awake when she is finished, I move back over into my bed. Sometimes I pull her in with me, and she has even crawled back into her bed a couple of times when I've done that.
Not too long ago, Adriana fell off a slide at the park. Brian had gone up the play structure with her and she was going down the slide by herself. I was sitting on a bench nearby, not near enough to catch her, as she went down the slide as she has done on her own plenty of times before, and shot off the bottom, landing on her back. (I think it was because she was wearing Robeez instead of sandals, and they didn't drag and slow her down.) She was more scared than hurt, and soon was climbing up to go down again. That time she again went too fast, but I was there to catch her. After that, she would climb up but refused to go down the slide, even on a lap or with someone there to catch her. In a way I was relieved. It's kind of nice to know that the child can actually learn from what has happened, and nice that she has a bit of fear. I've been wondering where this kid who climbs everything and goes down the biggest slides at the playground came from, given the fact that I am just about the world's biggest scaredy-cat. But I was also a little sad, because being a scaredy-cat is boring and frustrating. So even though I have been attempting to coax her down toddler-appropriate slides for the past ten days or so, I had mixed feeling yesterday when Adriana finally got over some caution and climbed to the highest point on the play structure at the park (easily 10 or 12 feet up, maybe more--I am a bad at guessing that kind of thing), and started to go down the slide by herself. In the end, I decided not to stop her from climbing, but I made her go down the slide in my lap.
Some days I'm better at this than others. Some days when Adriana shrieks for the 94th time that hour because I didn't respond to her quickly enough, instead of looking at the clock to see how much longer until Brian comes home, I kneel down in front of her and tell her that it's hard being little and hug her, and then offer her a snack or a toy or just tickle her. Some days, instead of just being glad that I managed to get both Adriana and myself dressed and that I had a chance to bake (and eat most of) a pan of brownies while she napped, I manage to plan and shop for meal for the week, wash and put away three loads of laundry, vacuum the house, fix dinner, and put together puzzles, read stories, and play at the park with Adriana. Most days fall somewhere in between. But every single day I know I am lucky.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Friday, May 16, 2008
Noticing a pattern
Last month, Adriana said "dog," her very first word. Yesterday she started in on her second: "woof woof."
No wonder the cat doesn't like her.
No wonder the cat doesn't like her.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)